Have you ever wanted to be somewhere do badly and felt completely helpless, because you couldn’t? I felt that way, and am still there this morning. Let me explain.
My mom called yesterday. She is depressed, very, and on top of that, she is having pains in her feet that the doctors can’t explain. She broke down over the phone, and it was that moment, that one moment, that I wish I could have dove through the phone and given her a hug and been there for her. All I could do was be on the phone until she stopped crying. I have never felt so helpless.
That night, I prayed for her, oh did I pray, and the tears started to flow. I got up from the bed and went into the livingroom until the tears subsided. My friend Amanda came out of her room, and put her arm around me. I heard a door open, and her mom came out. We prayed for my mother, and Tina, her mom prayed for me.
I am so blessed to have such good family. Can’t call them my friends really. They are more like family.
Yes, this day started out grey, rainy, and bleh. In the middle of the ick and the gloom, we are going to yard sales and a farmer’s market. Good thing my hair is naturally curly, and getting it wet doesn’t mean complete and utter ruin. It just means that It will get wet and curl up more as it dries.
And then there is Henry, the one I am trying to be too busy to drive myself crazy about. He sent me his good morning through Facebook, and told me he has paid for this phone. Now, I get to text him from my laptop whenever I have a thought of him. That is remarkably a lot more than most would think. I love him. This time away from him isn’t easy, but I am managing. He has two plans, either going owner-operator or finding a local job so that he can be home every night. He can’t stand being away from me, and I hate being apart from him.
We Skype, loving Skype, we message each other through Facebook, and we play World of Warcraft. Yes, he is a gamer, like me. We get on a voice chat, and he leads me around and through “dangers untold”, though we don’t fight our way to castles. (Yes, I did a Labyrinth reference.) He is helping me on the game. I hadn’t played it at all until he came back into my life. I love the game.
I am determined not to let the day bring me down. There is always something to do. There is always something to watch, edit, read, study, and there are always chores to do. There are plans to make, money to put back, food to make and pack, recipes for the crock to try, jewelry to make, and there is always, always, my love, whom I pray for every night when I go to bed.
Ever since I was a child, I loved watching the animated movies. I didn’t know how much I was missing until I got my hands on The Hobbit, and I realized how much I was missing. I loved the way the book was written, and my imagination conjured far better images than the movie. It wasn’t until I was a little older that I learned movies don’t always reflect the books. I still go back and watch the movies. I love the artistry in the animation.
It was after I had my son that I read The Lord of the Rings. I became completely immersed in the world and the realms that Tolkien had created. I fell in love with each character and the interactions between them. I laughed, I cheered, and I cried when Gandalf was lost. Oh did I cry. I was with Sam and Frodo on their journey, and cheered Sam on when, undaunted, he saved his friend and they finished their quest. I reached for the tissues again as they lay upon that rock waiting for death.
I was excited when the live-action movies hit the screen. Mind you, I wasn’t expecting everything in the book to be in the movies, but I was looking for key things, some little, some big.
I loved the fact they had Gandalf discover Sam listening in on the conversation between him and Frodo. I was in awe at the fireworks display, and the “disappearance” of Bilbo from his own party. I have always believed the little things make the movie worth seeing when you have fallen in love with the book. It had plenty of little things.
I missed Tom Bombodil. I know. I know. He wasn’t a main part of the story, but he did help the hobbits out, and I would have loved to see how they would have worked his wonderful spirit into the movie, him and Goldberry. Alas, I was a bit disappointed, but it didn’t last long.
The interaction between Legolas and Gimli had me in stitches. They got it perfect. I loved that. The littlest thing they got right? Merry and Pippin being taller than than Sam and Frodo after they drank the Ent Draught.
I loved the movies. Yes, I am showing my geek again, but I don’t care. lol
I have seen the first part of the Hobbit. Again, I was amazed. I loved how they left in enough little things to keep me smiling. Now, the inclusion of Legolas and adding a character that isn’t even in the book for a love interest for Legolas has me on edge. I do not mind leaving things out because of time constraints, but adding things in that are not in the book? I don’t like it. It trips the frustration switch. If it isn’t in the story, it shouldn’t be in the movie. Sorry, but that is just the way I see it. I will see the rest of the Hobbit movies. I will give them the benefit of the doubt. I will sit in the theater or with the disc in the laptop, and watch them objectively. I will. I really will. I promise.
Is it possible to have withdrawals from the one you love when they are not near you? I think so. I spend the first couple of days telling myself that I have to get my butt moving and get stuff done. I find myself getting easily distracted, and end up spending the whole day click between tabs and playing Farmville 2. (Yes, I play it.) I feel a bit lost. I miss him. I know I only just took him back to his truck this morning, but the next two weeks will be tough.
I will keep myself busy, making blog posts, lining up tutorials for the business blog, and making jewelry in the process. Iwill try my best not to worry about the people that cut in front him, and those that weave in and out of traffic. I won’t worry about what he is eating, and if he is getting enough sleep. I won’t worry about how lonely he is, being alone in the truck. No, I won’t worry. Not. One. Bit.
Okay, maybe a little. Maybe I will ask him what he has eaten that day when he has parked for his ten-hour break. Maybe I will ask him how he is sleeping. Maybe I will text him during the day, knowing that he can’t answer the phone because he is driving to let him know that I am thinking about him, and I miss him. I will pray for his safety every night before going to bed, because I know, when I can’t be there, God can and is watching over him every moment.
Let’s face it. I will worry. That’s what we do when we love someone.
So, I will worry. I will miss him, and I will be the happiest person on the face of the Earth when I am allowed back in the truck.
Hello, my name is Anissa, and I am a Whovian, Potterhead, Trekkie, Star Wars nut, and generally anything having to deal with sci-fi or fantasy, I am all over it. November 23, 2013, is the 50th anniversary of a show I started watching when I was a child with my grandfather. This show started November, 1963 and took a break in 1989. It came back in 2005, but in the hearts and minds of Whovians everywhere, it never really went anywhere. With Eleven, now twelve, different actors playing the parts during the years, this show has never lost its sense of wonder for me, nor will it. I have favorite episodes and ones that I was disappointed in, but doesn’t any show?
Since 2005, there has been an influx of new fans, mainly in part due to the young nature of the actors who played the part, and, if I may add, there attractiveness. Now that a new Doctor has been chosen, and he is older, there is a clamor among the fangirls that he is too old. I make this Whovianesque post in hopes to clarify somethings.
I make it a point every morning to write in my journal, the paper one. I keep track of personal stuff and how I am feeling now that I am forty, particularly, how my body is changing so I can stay ahead of it, hopefully. I am not going to fool myself into thinking that pre-menopause will simply skip me, and I will go straight into menopause, which for me would be a blessing. (When you have cramps like contractions, you pray for menopause. Believe me.)
After the journal, I read the bible while drinking my first two glasses of water. I am in Judges now. Then, I go into the room where the kittens are and get Neville for some morning kitty time. He played in my lap, and when breakfast was ready, this is what I saw when I looked down. How can you move something so cute? I eventually had to pick him up and put him back in the room.
In a effort to organize my life and officially fight being scatter-brained, I have a date book.
It’s small; so, no problems having it in the truck. It has hard covers. I can write on it anywhere. I have, in the monthly part, written what posts I am going to put on my business blog. In the weekly section, I have them written down a week ahead. This is so I am not frantically trying to post something the day it is due. So far, this system is working great.
Keeping any major bouts with depression at bay, I should be able to keep to this schedule and post Monday through Friday, giving myself the weekend to take breaks. Do any of you schedule your weeks?
Maybe I read this wrong, but having been brought up watching the movie, it seemed to me like she loved him in a small way at least. Reading the passages after not having read them in a long while, it seems to me as if she never loved him at all. She was full of deceit, lies and betrayal.
Samson lied to her as well, but to keep his secret, if only for a short while, but he finally told her, she betrayed him in the biggest way possible. Now, I have fallen short in my relationships. I am by no means perfect, none of us are, but how many times does it take for someone in love to finally realize that they are in a toxic relationship?
Don’t think me an unfeeling person. I understand about abuse and the mentally that many adopt in abusive situations. Some feel trapped, with no way out, and others feel it is their fault they are being treated the way they are. My question is this…
When do you know, after having tried everything in your power to improve your relationship, that it is time to leave? I understand full well that true Christian marriages are supposed to stand the test of time, but does that also mean that you have to be miserable for the rest of your life? Does that mean that God wants you to be in a relationship where you are depressed/abused/neglected?
I personally don’t think so, but I would like to hear some of your opinions.